My Light
by Mystery of the Wind
Summary: I always thought I'd be the one to go first, considering I was older than him. I thought that, until I turned on the TV in my kitchen, seeing him dead on the news. Now my life is just a freakin' mess... AKUROKU YAOI WARNING!
1. Chapter 1

**_Hey guys! :D _**

**_I can't believe that my twin found out! Yes, I'm a can be a little slow at times… Don't judge meh! D: But, I'm gonna go and get it out of her... If she doesn't say, then I'll beat it out of her. *evil smirk*_**

**_Didn't Dawn say that we'd be a bit… Weird, and post random things of our own on here…? I believe she did and I'm proud to be the first that does so, lol! But on with the story, and, even though it's kinda sad, I hope you enjoy it! :3_**

**_Disclaimer: Not mine! I can only wish that I did, and you'd know that there would be more goin' on with some of the characters, if you know wat I mean. ;)_**

**_Oh, and before you get to reading, one more thing: This is (*Roxy's edit*) POV through the whole thing! Unless, for some reason, I change that for one of the chapters. I doubt it though._**

oXoXo

My Light

Chapter 1.

I opened my eyes, seeing the moonlight that shown through my window, onto my bed, and into them. They automatically forced themselves shut. To get protection. I slowly opened them again and looked down at the watch, I had on my wrist, as I sat up.

_1:30 AM Saturday, November 15th__, 2008_

With an irritated sigh, I flopped back down. My unusual flat hair went behind me, as I looked over to my right, seeing my nightstand. I looked, farther up, and saw to frames, that I had put pictures in, just over a month ago. I could feel my heart ache, as I remembered the times that we had shared.

One of them had the both of us in it. We had been at the beach. Both of us were soaked from the waters of the ocean. He was on my back, looking like I was giving him a piggyback ride, with his unusual, flat, blonde hair, looking kind of wavy, and his chin was on my shoulder, next to my red hair, smiling; even his sapphire blue eyes were. Along with him, and my emerald green eyes, I smiled. I mean, who couldn't when you had a hot, blue eyed blonde on your back?

The second one was of my blonde. He had his right hand out, at arm's length, making a victory sign, winking his right eye, and smiling a lip smile. He had just won this thing called a "Struggle Match" and apparently was named the new champion. He was so happy that day…

I sat up again, my elbows on my legs, and chin in my hands. My heart still ached from just thinking about him.

So happy, so full of life! He was the light in my life, which was now gone because of those gang idiots. If there was only someway of rewinding time, I'd go back to that day in a heartbeat…

oXoXo

"_I'm leaving! I'll be back in 'bout thirty minutes!" He said, putting on his shoes._

"_My god! I'm right here, in the living room. No need to shout." I replied, getting up off the couch, and going over to him._

"_Well, how am I suppose to know where you are in this two story house of yours? It's so easy to get lost in!"_

"_To _you_ it might be, but not to _me_."_

"_Anyways, I'll try to be back in thirty minutes, like I said. I got my phone, when, and if, you want or need to call me."_

_To__ be honest, I didn't really want him to leave, but he wanted to. I had tried offering to either go with him or just go myself, but no. He wanted to get out and get some errands done, by himself._

"_Alright," I got down to his height, making my long spine bend. "But, be careful, ok?"_

"_Yes, Father." He said, jokingly, and winked at me. He turned around, heading toward the door._

_I turned him right back around. He looked at me, confused. _"_You forgot to do something."_

"_Oh?" He questioned, "What might that be?"_

_I chuckled a little bit, at him. Sometimes he could be so dense, while, other times, he was right on the dot._

"_Hello? What did I forget to do?"_

_Looking into his eyes, I softly put my lips on his, quickly, and, just as quickly, took them off. I saw a light blush on his cheeks._

"_Oh… Right." He said, embarrassed, that he had been so dumb._

_I gave him a small smile, as I ruffled his blonde hair. "Go now."_

_He kissed my cheek. "See you in a little bit." He opened the door, getting ready to leave._

"_Hey, if your gonna be later than thirty minutes, give me a call! Got it memorized?"_

_My blonde chuckled. "Yes, Axel, I got it memorized."_

"_Good. See you in a little while, Roxas."_

_He gave me a quick wave, before closing the door. Leaving to go do his errands…_

oXoXo

"_Hmph… More like, "Leaving my life forever…""_ I thought, looking over to my empty bedside.

My green eyes, with help from my heart, made me see his fragile figure, sound asleep. But I knew in my mind that he wasn't. Even so, I still reached out to him, going to move his hair out of his face.

_Clunk!_

I looked down to the floor, at the vents, listening closer.

_Clunk!_

"Stupid thing…" I looked back over, to where I was seeing the illusion of my blonde, not seeing him. I made a weak fist, as I brought back my arm and put my fist on the heart area of my chest, and just let it lay there. But it soon got stronger, when I thought of the morons who attacked him.

There had been two of them, of course, big, height wise, strong, and tough. My blonde was small, as in height, a little bit on the weaker side, and almost completely helpless. He hadn't done anything wrong, he hadn't messed with them, nor want to, so, why him?

"_Sorry, man, we thought it was someone else, I mean, the person we were looking for and him… They look so much alike."_

"_Bullshit! _Complete_ bullshit! No one, in this world, looked like Roxas, _but _Roxas!"_

I felt the anger start to boil in my bloodstream. All that gang wanted to do was pick on someone, like him, because they knew that he wouldn't be able to completely protect himself. That's all, nothing more.

After a few minutes, I don't know how or by what but, I calmed down. I laid my head on his pillow, that was still on my bed, and, just my luck, I could barely detect his scent. Not that I was one of those stalker boyfriends, but I really missed him. Could you really blame me? He became no more in this world just a little bit over two weeks ago.

_Gone_… I've always hated that word, just as much as non-flammable. Roxas hated it too. He thought that "_gone_" was used to much in everyone's vocabulary. I had to, and still do, agree with him, but it just fits perfectly with this situation.

He was _gone_… _Gone_ forever, and there was nothing that I do about it!

I felt sadness stun my whole body. He could've been here with me right now, if I hadn't let him go. I was, also, so close to asking him to move in with me, that I could taste it! He had spent countless days and nights over here that his home didn't really seem to exist. But _no_. I let him go off, by himself, to go do his errands!

God! My reason for life is _gone_, and not going to come back! Why? Why couldn't it have been me attacked by them, instead of Roxas?

I slowly looked at my watch, again.

_2:15 AM Saturday, November 15__th__, 2008_

My arm fell back down, like it was dead. Closing my green eyes, I fell asleep, thinking about our memories.

oXoXo

_**:D So what did you guys think? Ik it's sad, but it's going to be for a while, just a warning. ;) And no I'm not depressed or an emo, I just get ideas and write them down. I actually started writing this when we were going to Cocoa Beach!**_

_**But, anyway, please review! If you want, go ahead and tell me what's wrong with it, if anything, lol. Love ya all who actually read our crap. XD**_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2.

"_Axel! C'mon Axel, you gotta get your lazy ass out of bed now, or you'll never get out!"_

My eyes barely opened up from hearing that voice. I could've sworn it was him.

"_Maybe this was all a "dream"… Maybe he _is_ downstairs, waiting for me to get out of bed!"_

I rolled over, facing toward the door, "And if I _don't_ get my "lazy" ass out of bed?"

… No response back.

I sighed, closing my eyes. "Figured." I said to myself, as I got up, even though I didn't want to…

oXoXo

"_Axel! C'mon Axel, you gotta get your lazy ass out of bed now, or you'll never get out!"_

"_And if I _don't _get my "lazy" ass out of bed?"_

"_Then I'm gonna kick it out!"_

_I put my feet on the cold carpet, getting up, and walked over to my dresser. "Oh ho! I don't think you would be able to do that, my dear Roxy."_

_There was a low clunk from him slamming the, one of many, cupboards. "Are you calling me weak?_

_After getting my lower half of my body covered and slipping on a shirt I got from my closet, I walked into the bathroom, leaving the door open. "Of course not! I never said such a thing."_

_A slam on the kitchen table, as I try to decide between spiking my hair and just letting it go flat. "But you indicated it."_

_Shrugging to myself, I decided to leave it flat and started walking down the stairs. "No, I didn't._

"_Yea… You kinda did." I saw him turn his back towards the staircase__._

_My long legs allowed me to get to where he was, rather quickly, and put my arms around him. "Well… If I did, I didn't _realize_ it, and I'm really sorry." I nuzzled his neck._

_He chuckled lightly. This was different. This time _I_ was the one confused by the other's action. "What's so funny?" I asked, after I raised my head._

"_Nothing, it's just that, I knew you meant no harm, but if this is what you do," He indicated to my arms around his waist and how I was just nuzzling his neck. "Every time you think I'm upset with you, I should _really_ think about being upset with you more often."_

_I gave a fake pout, "You know I don't like it when you're upset with me."_

"_I was only kidding."_

"_I know."_

_He gave a quick glance over to the coffee pot, "Axel…"_

"_Hmm?" I hummed, putting my neck on his shoulder, my throat going on his collar bone._

"_I need to check something…"_

"_Its not ready."_

_He cocked his head to the right, "How can you tell?"_

"_Too early in the morning." I purred, thrusting my hips into his ass._

_He went forward, a little bit. And I could've sworn I heard a tiny gasp. "I-I didn't mean check on _that_. What I meant was check on the pot over there." He indicated to the coffee pot._

"_Oh! Why didn't you say so?" I asked, letting him go._

"'_Cause I didn't think you were gonna twist the meaning to my words."_

_As he walked away from me to check on the coffee, I couldn't help but get a little… Handy, and I gave him a light slap on the arse. He turned around and looked at me, with a face that seemed to say "What the hell is wrong with you?"._

"_You're a bit… Touchy today."_

_I gave him a smirk. "Yea. 'Cause I know that neither one of us have anything to do today."_

"_I think you're only assuming, like that one time when my parents were over at my house and you entered through the door that lead into my kitchen…"_

"_How was I suppose to know that your parents were in town?"_

"_You could've called, instead of unsuspectingly come over, making us both aroused." He poured two cups of coffee._

"_I'm sorry, that I have bad timing." I took one of the cups that he offered me._

"_How 'bout when my boyfriend broke up with me and you saw that I was sitting on a bench, looking heartbroken? Would ya call that "bad timing"?" _

_I was leaning in a corner of a counter when I pull him towards me again. No resistance. "No. I would say it was one of the _few times _that my timing has been _perfect_." Looking down, he looked up, at his blue eyes, I smiled at him._

_He smiled back, "I'm glad that your timing was perfect that day, 'cause I could be in the same position all over again right now, if I had stayed with _him_."_

"_He was a player and a __slut anyways."_

"_Like I said: I'm glad we found one another." He snuggled his back into me._

_It didn't bother me that Roxas' boyfriend before me was almost a copy of me, but what did bother me was that all he did was use him for his wants… Until he found someone else. "Damn Reno…"_

"_Hmm?" He hummed. Apparently he hadn't been paying attention._

"_Nothing…" I answered, wrapping one of my arms around his waist, in almost a protecting way. I always found it strange, how Reno used my Roxy and he didn't seem to remember. Maybe it was by choice…?_

_All of my other thoughts were cut off, as I felt Roxas grinding his hips backwards onto my hips. I bit my lower lip, as I put down my cup, taking his away and putting it down as well. Wrapping my other arm around his waist, I made my spine bend, which made my face get close to the side of his. I put my lips close to his ear, and I licked the shell of his ear. Which in turn, made him quit grinding his hips and shiver._

"_You're being bad." I said with a smirk__._

oXoXo

I decided to skip the idea to eat, as I walked outside, to start on my way to get to Roxas' parent's hotel. I called them, telling them what had happened and they said that they would call me when they got into town. They called me the other day, telling me they were in and were wanting me to come to the room, but went against going, as I didn't feel like getting out of bed and going somewhere.

"Hey Axel! Get yourself a new boyfriend yet?" Xigbar sneered, walking past me down the street.

I gave no answer. Everybody, that I knew, besides his parents, my parents, and my two friends, Zexion and Demyx, thought that I had hired the gang members to kill Roxas. Not sure how that all got started, but it was ridiculous. Of course I was upset when I got to the scene, but who wouldn't? Just because it seemed like I was trying to act, doesn't mean that I was. All I was doing was innocently grieving over his death. Naturally, the police _were_ going to question me, thinking of me as a suspect, until they saw me. Yelling at the men who actually did it.

I looked at my watch, hoping that it wasn't to early for his parents to be up.

_8:13 AM Saturday, November 15th__, 2008_

"_I bet they're up… But if I now just woke them up…" _Images ran through my head of what Mr. Strife would look like, from waking him up early, and I put my hand over my forehead, closing my green eyes. _"Oh lordy lord, I can only beg for mercy… And, I can be glad that looks don't kill…"_

I opened my eyes, taking my hand off my head, using it to knock on the door. I pleaded in my head that I wasn't waking them up.

The door opened, showing me Mrs. Strife. "Why, hello, Axel. I was beginning to wonder if you were going to stop by at all. C'mere."

You could clearly see that she had approved of our relationship. I was never, and still not, sure about his father.

I allowed her to give me a hug. I hugged back for little bit, but when I went to let go, I realized she was still holding on, so I kept my arms around her.

She was short and thin, like Roxas. His father was thin too, but his mother seemed to match his frame and thinness more. I felt my heart rip more when I thought of the similarities. How much, from just hugging his mother, reminded me so much of him.

I felt my shirt getting a little damp. I could only figure that she was crying.

"_A quiet crier… Like Roxas…"_

"C'mon dear, let 'im in." Mr. Strife said to his wife.

Bringing my arms back, as well hers, she gave a light sniffle as she went to her husband. He put an arm around her waist, as she somewhat snuggled up to him. I came in, closing the door behind me.

oXoXo

_**Reviews are the key to my lock…**_

_**I'm going to warn everyone that the next chapter is going to be a little short… Purposely. ;) I may get it up pretty soon also! :D**_

_**XD But, Lyr-Lyr loves ya guys! And so does Daw-Daw! ;3**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**Just going to say, this is no one's POV ;)**_

Chapter 3.

Gasping, eyes opening and going wide, while sitting up. Part of a white sheet, landing on his lap

Cough after cough, he looked around, confusedly. Wondering where the hell he was. The room looked… Plain, pretty cold, and a bit dark.

He went to rub his eyes, after he was done with his coughing fit, wincing at the pain that it caused. Looking down, besides noticing that he was shirtless, he saw that he had bruises all over his chest; they looked like they were about to go away. Not remembering what had happened to him, at the moment, he wondered to himself: How did I end up here? Why do I have bruises all over me? Where am I?

While getting off of a gurney table looking thing, he could feel, and hear, almost all of his joints pop. The male jumped from foot to foot, trying to get use to the cold tile. But while doing so, he saw that, not only was he shirtless but, he had no pants on either. That's right! Completely _nude_!

Without thinking, he immediately jerked at a sheet on a different table, jumping when he saw the dead body. Leaving that sheet where it laid, he took off the one that was on his table, tying it around his waist.

"_I don't think I _wanna_ know where I am but I _need_ to know so I can get out of here."_

As the male walked around in the unusual place, he looked around and saw more of the same tables that he, and the other body, were on. Deciding on _not_ wanting to think about the death that was around him, the male decided that he would try to remember how he got in this place. Then it hit him…

oXoXo

"I am so freakin' attacking him went I get back. But first…" _He took out a little list that he had wrote out earlier, _"I gotta do _these_ things."

_Rolling his eyes, he walked down the sidewalk. He stopped near an alleyway, to pay for a newspaper. But while doing so, he felt like he was being… Watched. Trying to ignore the fact, the male was walking past the alleyway, until he felt himself being pulled back into the darkened area, being pinned._

"_You, are in trouble with us!"_

"_Wh-What?" He stuttered. "I have no clue what you're talkin' about!"_

"_Hey look! He doesn't have a clue what we're talkin' 'bout! Well, maybe we should knock it back into ya!" The other man raised a fist._

_The male, that was being pinned, eyes went wide. "N-No! I-I think you have mistaken me for another!" He struggled against his restrain and cried, "Please! Let me go!"_

_Pain suddenly filled the young male's left eye socket. "Shaddup! You know what you did!"_

_After a painful beating, there was pain throughout the small man's body. As he tried to get back up, from off the ground, he glared as he said, "Love will conquer-"_

"_Didn't I tell ya to be quiet?"_

_Another hit into the smaller male's, and he was back down. He didn't move. He said as the air escaped his lungs, "All…" And he laid there. Lifeless._

oXoXo

Hit him… That was defiantly a term that he was _not_ going to use again.

Roaming around in the mild darkness, he felt cold and untied the sheet that was around his waist, starting to wrap it around him. There was a creaking sound and more light as he did so.

"Now, how the hell did you get in here?"

He turned around, seeing who the voice was coming from. It was a woman. "I could almost ask you the same thing."

"Well, supposedly, you ended up here from being beaten to death. But it sure looks like you ain't dead now. Come with me."

"Wait," The male said, before moving an inch. "I have to know one thing."

"Fine, but can you walk and talk at the same time?"

He gave a nod as he followed the woman, to wherever she was taking him.

"So, what was the thing that you wanted to know?" She asked.

"Oh right! Um… Where's Axel? Axel Lea."

"Probably at his home planning your funeral. He seemed like a very good friend to you."

"… But he's not my friend."

"Brother?"

"No, Axel Lea is my boyfriend, and I need to let him know that I'm alright. Can we do that really quick?"

The woman smiled a little at how the male was showing consideration for his boyfriend. But her smile faded when she thought about the medical examiner's response to her asking him if they could make a phone call to Axel Lea. "I dunno, Hun. May-"

"Please ma'am? I hate letting him think I'm not alright."

She looked into his sea blue eyes, that had some thick strands of blonde hair in front of them, from his hair being flattened from their former spikes. They were just begging her to say yes. "We'll see. I'm not sure if I can get an ok."

He smiled and looked right into her dark blue eyes, to say a silent thank you and looked away.

The woman sighed quietly to herself, as she readjusted her shoulder length hair from all of it being behind her to part of it on her right shoulder and behind her. _"Why must all the cute, adorable ones be gay?"_

oXoXo

_**And there is your third chapter, and I'm sorry for the broken promise. We got busy with visiting family… No freakin' internet what so ever! But still I apologize, hope you all forgive me, and hope that I have a lot of time to keep writing.**_

_**Am I aloud to have any reviews? =D**_


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4.

I sat down on the couch in Roxas' parent's hotel room, which just happened to be across from the other pieces of furniture, making one another actually look at each other.

"Did you eat yet, Hun?" His mother asked me, holding out a plate that held bagels.

I barely opened my mouth to protest that I wasn't hungry, but my empty stomach beat me to answering. The woman smiled warmly at me and put the plate down at a height that I could see and pick one.

Humph, forcing food down my throat. So she's the one he gets it from…

oXoXo

"_Would you_ please_ eat something before you go off to work?"_

_Looking at the clock, I raised an eyebrow and looked at his blue eyes. "I have an hour before I go, Rox."_

"_So? Can you please eat? I hate it when you do! It makes me feel like you're goin' hungry…"_

"_My god, Roxy, I'm not. Plus, if I ever get hungry while workin' I can always take a break an' eat some bar food."_

"_Wait- Doncha work in the restaurant tonight?"_

_I grabbed my cigarettes and lighter as I shook my head. "It's Friday night, my love. I will be when it's Sunday."_

"_Well… Could you eat _anyways_?" He replied and wrapped his arms around my waist._

_I had a just put a cigarette in my mouth when he wrapped around me. I looked down, seeing the serious expression on his face while taking the cig out of my mouth and holding it between my fingers. I smiled and ruffled his down, damp blonde hair. "Rox-as I'll be fine don't worry."_

oXoXo

Ok, so he was a bit more pushy than his mother. Well, I guess I couldn't blame him for worrying… I looked and still look like an anorexic. I probably worry his mother too. I looked at the coffee table that was in between the two pieces of furniture, and didn't even noticed that I had spaced out and nibbled little on the bagel.

Somehow I got to thinking about how Roxas and his mother were similar in ways and then got to wondering what else his father gave him, besides a bit of his facial features, his eye and hair color, and his… "emoness", at times.

Looking back up from the table with the bagel just barely between my lips, I had a look on my face, that he would've said, that held a little kid that had just been caught doing something wrong.

The woman chuckled at me. "Why Axel, you look like a child that's been caught doing something!"

What a coincidence…

I took the bagel away from my lips, licking away any left over crumbs, and wiped the look off my face. And I realized that we were suppose to be in a conversation. "I-I'm sorry. I didn't listen all that well, could you say, whatever you said, again?"

"Well," his mother looked at her phone as if she were waiting for him to call. "A-All I said was that I just miss his calls." I saw a tear or two fall down her cheek. She soon started to quietly sob.

Mrs. Strife and Roxas were very close. Most of the time it seemed like she was more of his best friend then his mother.

He and his father were close too, but not as close. They knew the basics of one another, that was about it. But his mother knew _everything_. And I do mean _everything_.

oXoXo

"_Are you _sure_ 'bout your ma, and family, being ok with _this_?" I asked, lifting up our clasped hands._

_Roxas chuckled at me. "For the hundredth millionth time, yes. They're gonna love you!" He chuckled a bit when he felt me jerk from hearing his parent's dog bark at us._

_Funny, I always thought of his family more of cat lovers, not dog._

"_Don't worry 'bout 'er. She won't hurt ya. Oh, and speaking of worry. Keep your eye on Sora."_

_I cocked my head as I raised an eyebrow. "I thought ya said that he was with-"_

"_Yea, yea, I know I said that he was with _Kairi_," he looked down and mumbled something about Riku that I couldn't totally catch._

"_Aw, he ain't gonna be any trouble." I gave a wink to him as we walked up the steps to the door._

_Roxas shrugged while he rang the door bell. "Just thought I'd letchya know."_

_Leaning down, I was kissing him on the lips, until I heard someone go "Aw!", and I pulled away and straightened up again._

_The woman, who I could assume was his mother, chuckled at us. "I'm sorry, that one was my fault."_

"_It's _fine_ Mom. Don't worry 'bout it!" My blonde said with a smile._

_She gave a content huff as she looked at me. "Well, you _must_ be Axel."_

_I nodded at the woman. "Y-Yea… I am."_

_His mother looked back at her son. "He seems like a keeper Rox." She gave him a wink._

"_Mo-om!" _

oXoXo

What a great first impression, am I right?

All I heard his mother sob her quiet sobs until I heard… Lady Gaga?

"_Just dance! Gonna be ok! Gotta do it 'nd just dance! Spin that record babe-!"_

His mother liked Lady Gaga? "Um… D-Do I hear someone's phone ringing?"

"_Just dance! Gonna be ok! Just, just-"_

"That's me." She sniffled a little. "Sorry."

"_J-J-Just-"_ "Hello?_ … _Wh-Who is this?"

Both Mr. Strife and I just looked at the only woman in the room as her eyes widened. Her eyes had watered up from tears again. "Oh, I'm so happy! Where do you want to meet?"

"_How the hell can you be happy at a time like this! Your freakin' son died not long ago!"_ Was all I could think. And judging by the look on his father's face he was most likely thinking the same thing.

"Great! We'll see you there! … Of course, him too." She looks over at me.

"_How the hell did I get into the freakin' conversation?"_

"Actually he's right here." Still looking at me, my blonde's mother gave me a smile with tears still running down her cheeks.

"_What the fuck does the person on the other line want from me?"_

"Do you want to speak with him?"

"_The fuck woman? I don't wanna talk to anyone! You're lucky I came to the hotel!"_

Handing me the phone, she smiled and gave me a half nod, like she was trying to say "It's alright.". Putting the cell near my ear, I opened my mouth trying to get something to come out.

It actually took a good three minutes for me to get my greeting to get out. "Yo?"

"_Axel?"_

They spoke to quietly and I couldn't catch anything. "Yo? If you're there, I can't hear you."

"_Axel? Axel, It's Roxas!"_

This time I could hear the person on the other line and my heart completely stops.

oXoXo

_**XP God, when I looked back on chapter three and got to the part where Roxas got beat… All I could think was: "**_**The **_**hell**_** was I **_**thinking**_**, or **_**on**_**, when I made him say "Love will conquer all."?**_**" … Not saying that I take anything! Wait- I could've been high off of those caffeine free things from Starbuck's… o.o But, please dun ask about **_**why**_** I made Roxas' mother like Lady Gaga. X3**_

_**Also, I don't, under any circumstances, support SoKai or whatever the hell you call it. I felt like making him somewhat straight and there wasn't any other girl that Sora looked ok with. I thought about **_**(Roxy's edit) **_**but since she was the one that found Roxas… God, I dun like Kairi… XP**_

_**Any who, are reviews in order? :3**_


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